photo credit: Alex Green
Change is a byproduct of the fast-moving times we live in. Whether you are an individual or an organisation, adapting to change is a necessary skill one must acquire. Organisations are under pressure to be responsive to the latest technological advancements, financial pressures and social expectations in order to remain competitive and relevant. This means that most workplaces this day are in a constant state of flux.
As a counsellor who works mainly with professionals, I have observed the impact these constant and sometimes drastic changes have on workplace culture and more importantly employee wellbeing. Very rarely do I come across a company that acknowledges the tremendous psychological impact a major restructure and the resulting job losses have on employees. Also, most people don’t associate grief with a change of job or environment. Yet, change and loss go hand in hand. Change by definition is the the act of making something different. This means that in order for something new to emerge, something else must be lost. This may be a department, a job, a routine or a way of doing business that has become familiar or second nature. Yet, it is inevitable that loss of any kind leads to grief.
The effects of workplace change and loss
A few years ago, I was contacted by a Chief Exec who was empathetically atuned to the emotional turmoil of his employees following the announcement of a major restructure. This company had a culture of transparency and trust which meant that employees there felt psychologically safe and had established close working relationships. The announcement of losing 30 percent of staff from their foreign head office was not only shocking but anxiety inducing. Many employees had been employed for over a decade and many much longer than that. This means that for many, work was a second home. It was familiar, secure and a source of contentment.
The announcement of this restructure meant that whether they were staying or going, all employees were anticipating the loss of an important chapter of their lives. They were all mourning the loss of their friendships, their daily routine and the sense of security they had enjoyed for so long. They were also feeling the anxiety of uncertainty -not knowing what the future looked like, as well as feeling a sense of helplessness that comes from change being thrust upon them.
Recently, a recruitment company I had been providing mental health services to for some years went into administration. This organisation had established a workplace culture and environment that was very popular with their millennial employee base; they had also created excellent relationships with their clients and suppliers. As a result, the loss of this organisation triggered a collective grief felt by many.
Many employees of this firm were forced to undergo significant change that included new employment, relocation, new routine, financial re-adjustments and a social renewal. In addition, these changes also affected relationships and/or family dynamics. During this time of upheaval, many individuals reached out to me for support. They were all surprised to realise that their emotional struggles related to grief.
Learning to Mourn
Despite change being a constant in our lives, most people don’t know how to consciously cope with loss. Yet, mourning can be greatly facilitated by simply knowing what to expect and accepting that emotional anguish is part of the process. So let’s start with understanding the basics. Grief is the mental, emotional, physical and behavioural response to any loss -may it be the death of a loved one or the end of a relationship, stage of life, job or major change in circumstance. This means that we feel loss at every level of our being. It also means that we experience grief more often than we imagine.
Everyone experiences grief in their own unique way. However, there are common symptoms most people can relate to. In terms of workplace loss, I have found that many people experience one or more of the following: sadness, anger, denial, anxiety and/or yearning for the familiar. Emotions seem to come in waves and can last briefly or persist for longer.
The process of adapting to change and loss is called mourning and it involves adjusting to the new whilst missing the old. During this time, most people experience a level of stress and anxiety due uncertainty. This in turn causes exhaustion, sleep problems, changes in appetite, upset stomach and restlessness. In terms of mental responses, the most common complaint is not being able to switch off because the mind tends to go into overdrive when it is trying to learn something new or find a resolution. The good news is that the symptoms of grief tend to diminish over time as new routines and environments become more familiar.
I believe we are all capable of adapting to loss with greater ease and grace. This is what I call, learning to mourn. How do we do this? The first step is to release self-judgement. This enables us to be objective and become aware of what we need emotionally, mentally, physically and socially. The next step is to take the action necessary to meet those needs. It is also crucial that we learn to give ourselves comfort, reassurance, soothing and affection as this greatly reduces our stress and anxiety and accelerates the healing process. Finally, it is hugely beneficial talking to others about one’s experience of change and loss, and the internal experience that results from it.
If you are interested in learning more about the counselling and personal development services I provide to individuals and groups, do get in touch.
Contact me on: jaimie@upliftmentalhealth.co.uk or visit www.uplitmentalhealth.co.uk